Here I Go Again

Well, here I am: no job, no car, single, and living in my parents’ basement. This will be great material if I decide to do stand-up comedy someday. The first few days here were filled with activity because it was a long holiday weekend. But today they both went to work, like real grown-ups, and I sat there drinking my coffee, doing the word jumble, and feeling like the ultimate loser.

And then I found that I couldn’t even throw a successful pity party for myself, because I’ve been here before and I know that despite a present lack of direction and low energy, things will turn around. I’m just feeling really impatient. How long do I have to wait to get over everything and get going again?

While I wait for clarity and inspiration, my parents are remodeling their home. A contractor is adding on a couple of rooms and knocking down a wall, an electrician is rewiring stuff, and I’m earning my keep by vacuuming a lot. The upheaval continues! It really is funny how precisely my inner and outer circumstances are aligned.

And just to amuse the gods even more, there is a family reunion for my grandpa’s 90^th birthday two weeks from now. This will require a road trip and lodging with family members. I have a large, inquisitive, well-meaning family, and I do love them. But I really don’t love talking right now. 

And yet…I do love my life! There’s never a dull moment. Even my anxious impatience is mostly curiosity. What on earth am I going to do?